I am trying so hard to leave everything from my previous life behind while keeping the best parts of myself. My artistic skills are important to me. Music in all forms, art in all forms, science, health.. everything. Relationships are important too.

While I am alive, I am trying to reincarnate myself without actually dying. I want to bring all of the best parts of myself forward as I shed each chapter before I get to the next.

The hardest lesson I have learned in this life, so far, is that you need something huge to happen so you can move forward in your life. You don’t need someone to die, you just need to think they did so when they come back you can learn who they are after the death of their old life has passed.

Right now, I am in purgatory. I am living in mourning of my previous life while also striving for the next one. I want to keep my momentum and I want my family to fully see me happy. I don’t mind if I die fat, as long as I die happy and living a life that inspires others to be the best versions of themselves. If I die fat, it just means that I didn’t get a chance to live the lifestyle I want to long enough to have everything work out like I would have enjoyed.

Now, the crazy mania speak… I imagine going to the party at transcend 2026, having an amazing time. Seeing people, dancing, enjoying every aspect of life. Camping, everything. During my time away, I would have everything I owned moved. Important things like photos, photo albums, and whatever paperwork I have are safe while all of my junk that I don’t actually need or use often can be replaced.

I want to wake up from a dream with new teeth, a new body, a life of a goddess even though I am just a woman. I want to keep my tattoos, lose my stomach and extra skin wherever it hangs, have healthy hair, my tubes back in place, and feel completely reborn. This could make having a baby created out of pure love and magic actually happen. I don’t want to know if I have a tubal reversal while I’m under. I want to make a “magic baby” with a man who really deserves to see every single dream coming true. I would love to give a single soul the ability to feel what life is like when your parents have every dream happen rather than being made from stress and survival.

I doubt any of those things can actually happen. I doubt I will be able to make my children proud of who I am. I doubt my electronics will be shared with my children. I doubt my babies will see me hitting my peak, and soaring the sky while I am alive. I want to live as a human being Isis in some form. I don’t want anyone to know I feel like her. I would love to have the responsibility of the goddess Isis because every time period needs to have someone that can be in the history books that is inspiring to others.

I have given up pieces of myself to every single person I find important. I have given service where I could. Now I want to live a life of travel and inspiring others to share their pain with me so they can let it go and I can actually help the people who reach out become the best versions of themselves.

We need our country to be lead by a goddess. Someone who knows financial issues, can see the weak spots, stop fights, breaks cycles, and has faith in the universe in a way no one can understand.

I may or may not be some kind of science experiment. My first near death experience was when I was about 10-12 years old. I saw what my parents called “God” and I told my family all about what I was going to do with my life. This journey is the result of that story.

I don’t know if my father has been able to reach a point in his life where he can come back from the pain he carries. I want him to. I want to have my father walking and happy. I want him to have a life of someone who raised a goddess. I want to see him healthy before he passes. I want him to be able to fish with my best friend’s father. They have so much in common that my father would finally have a friend that is able to talk about only good things. I bring my father sadness. I only want to bring happiness to everyone in my life.

I look back at my previous life, the things and people I walked away from. I left so many wonderful people because I never belonged and I was always destined to become greater than I was when I was born. I was never meant to live in a small town, doing nothing special with my life. I was born to be the change the world needs to have.

I wish all elections were ended because the political fight is just a bunch of people trying to decide what’s the better evil. I want to see the country to be run by surveys and golden hearts. I want to see the universe change because they saw what happens when someone like me, steps up and says “That’s enough!”

I have seen far too much fighting. It’s constant! Every single day in some form or another.

I want to make everyone feel they can make their dreams come true with hard work and dedication. I want to show people you can leave what’s hurting you without feeling anger or resentment to the people who betrayed you in the worst moments of their lives. I want to see what would happen to a baby that was created after their mother gave up every piece of herself just to become the best version of herself possible.

I would love to die in every aspect of the sense, as long as I could be resurrected and have every one of my dreams come true. If I had a baby, I would drag that child around with me constantly. I would teach them all of the important skills they need in life while exposing them to different cultures and historical sites around the world. I would be writing my book every day without even realizing that’s exactly what I was doing.

I am so ready to start writing my third book. That’s the book of what happens when you start actually living the dream life you thought was impossible. A baby created out of magic and pure love. Lots of traveling, meeting people, and only the people who know me intimately get to call me my chosen name.

I hope to be the goddess our planet needs. I am really just a human, trying her best, to be the best version of herself possible.

I never thought I could be in a place that would make all of my dreams come true. Eventually, I want a library like in Beauty and The Beast. I want resources from every culture that includes things like myths, meanings, cookbooks, and stories worth retelling.

I am in love with myself in a way that makes it impossible to put into words.

Maybe there is a lab somewhere that is waiting for me to “die” one last time, just so they can watch how my body and brain responds when they have the ability to really watch what happens to a person willing to die and resurrect themselves enough times that their dreams can come true.

If I were to die next week, just to be reborn and have all of my dreams come true, I would be thrilled. I wish I could have only good things happening to me for the rest of my life. I will deal with all of the emotions and consequences that come from that as long as the team watching me keeps me safe. Because I am sure, there is a team keeping me safe now. I call that team a metaphysical entity because there is no way to explain my inner compass any other way.

Of course, I need an army to keep me safe in the real world if anything were to happen that made me an actual “Isis reincarnated.” My best friend sees me as Isis. The same goddess I have been trying to become my entire life. There will be hurt people in the world that wish harm on me. Those people need to have a safe space to tell me what they are angry about and why they feel jealous. Those same hurt people should be given a free copy of my first book so they know I understand the pain they’re feeling. I am just the individual entity they chose to put the pain they are feeling upon before they feel safe enough to really deal with the things life has given them and the choices they made in each situation.

I like to think I have always made the best choice with every opportunity I was given. My brother died when he was 40, I started to live when I turned 40. That was a dark 3 year period that ruined a lot of things for me. I have a lot of plans that would never happen because my dreams were so much bigger and brighter than I deserve.

I don’t deserve to have my dreams come true. I am just trying to be the best version of myself and make good choices. I literally stepped out of a still moving car to walk home 3.5 miles in the pouring rain because the anger that was being thrown at me was deserved, compounded to a point it should never have been, and shared with emotions that got mixed up.

I am a human. I am a mother. I am a leader. and when I die, I hope I am an inspiration to future generations helping them create the world they thought could never happen.